As of last Saturday, my brother is officially a married man. Yes, the timing to do exactly 6 days before my 30th did not go unnoticed.
Unfortunately, I couldn't make it to his wedding due to limited vacation and hopes that I would instead be spending Christmas with family this year (which I am).
I've known about his wedding for over a year, so when the date came, I wasn't caught by surprise by it. What I wasn't expecting was my mom going on and on about how it was a wonderful party, how everyone loved it and how incredible it all was.
Because the bride's family? Spent an estimated 70k for the party. My family? I'll be lucky if when I get married they can contribute more than a couple of grand to it.
There were 380 guests in attendance. All the female guests received custom made flipflops (havaianas to be exact) so they could remove their high heels for the reception. They didn't have a band, instead, they had a "escola de samba" including the samba dancers. All the guests got funky costumes to wear for the reception -- like big glasses, hats, wigs (I think this is some sort of Brazilian tradition though).
My mom, who doesn't even wear make up, spent $500 on a hair and make up appointment.
And my whole conversation with her was all about the wedding. If I tried to change the subject, to mention that "hey, the boy and I was just talking about our wedding this weekend" she would change the subject back to the party.
Don't get me wrong, I'm happy for my brother, I really am. Even though I think his wife, who is 23, is way too young to be getting married, my brother, who just turned 27 is at an ok age.
But... but... I feel like there is no way I can now compare. Despite being the oldest I obviously won't be the first to get married. When I do, there's no way I can afford a party that would be remotely similar to this (and to be honest, if I had the money, I probably would choose to spend on something else).
So I feel like I missed the boat. When it happens, it won't provoke the same excitement from my family. I'll be just another kid getting hitched. Well, another kid getting hitched with a simple party.
And I know the family will be comparing the spectacular party, with my humble one. And I can't help but be disappointed. That a day that will undoubtedly be special to me, will cause disappointment in others, a party that will pale in comparison to the last one they attended.
9/16/09
Second Place
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4 comments:
Marry rich, duh. I am kidding. I have been to many weddings, extravagant & not. The thing that matters is love. That transcends anything. And, if your family & friends are disappointed in your ceremony of dedicating yourself to another, even if it's humble, that's really their issue. You haven't missed any boat.
Eh, I went to B's sister's wedding a couple weeks ago... it was in a log cabin on a lake, the whole shebang couldn't have cost over 5k, and it was absolutely perfect. It's not the money... it's the people who are there.
And also the booze.
I gotta say I really doubt your brother did it on purpose. The date that is. When I picked a wedding date, it ended up being 2 weeks after my birthday and 3 weeks after my sister's birthday. I would've much preferred a different date to be honest but it just happened to work out that way. My sister's birthday ended up being the day before my bachelorette party so we had a joint party for her too!
No matter how we try to plan things sometimes, it just doesn't work out how we want it.
Oh and ditto what Lilu said, it's not about the money or the extravagance, it's about the people.
Amy, the marry rich thing is already out of the window :)
LiLu -- that's what I always thought, but my mom never even had a wedding herself (they just married in court), so her talking non-stop about it, when she could care less about weddings, shocked me.
Jo, I know they didn't choose the date on purpose. I don't think any of them realized that it was my birthday. I wasn't taken into consideration at all, since they booked a September wedding (not the best time for me to visit Brazil in the winter).
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