The frogs...

Yes, I might still fall flat on my face and get my heart broken. But even if things with me and Pretty Boy don't work out (and I so hope they will!), I can't deny that so far, he has been nothing but wonderful.

Usually, I have to delete a guy's number or email from my phone so I'm not tempted to contact them. PB hasn't once given me a reason to do so -- he ALWAYS contacts me. If I text/email him, he ALWAYS replies. Since the day we met there hasn't been one day I haven't heard from him.

I have certainly blogged a few times about bad dates... Or about guys that just don't treat me right, don't call me, disappear, and don't really act like they're interested. I did meet a couple of nice guys here and there, but it went nowhere. I got hit on by married guys, who thought I was the answer to their problems.

I mentioned how I thought I was incapable of loving again. I mentioned how I wanted a guy with balls, who I didn't have to chase, and he'd show interest in me. I talked about a guy who split the bill when I hadn't even eaten, and didn't even bother walking me to my car late at night.

And how I met a guy who I hit it off with right away, but he considered Herndon and Arlington to be long distance. How suddenly I was getting hit on by 23 year-olds.

How I had liked a guy, despite all his flaws (and there were a lot), and thought maybe I had found a good one -- totally missing all the signals that he was not a good one after all (all my friends saw it, and hated him the whole time. I should have trusted their judgment). He kept on giving me mixed signals, and then finally dumped me.

Of course, I was over him pretty quickly... Let's face it, getting dumped by him hurt much more my ego than anything else.

As soon as I got back online, I was able to score 3 dates in one week. Two didn't pan out, one eventually became a volleyball friend.

And of course, my last dates were with Scottish Guy. At first, there were no sparks, then he canceled on me a few times, how I went out with him again anyway, until he finally kissed me. But even then, he wasn't acting that interested and we ended up having a bad date. And how even our last date, before he left town for over a month wasn't that great.

And somehow, if it wasn't for finally meeting Pretty Boy, Scottish Guy would have likely returned from his trip, and I would still be shuffled around. After so many years of so many bad guys, I lost track of what's important. It's hard to compare things, when you don't have anything good to compare it to.

My standards were low beyond normal. No, not the standards in the physical department, but mostly my standards in what I really deserve.

And then, PB approached me, and within days made me totally forget about Scottish Guy (so much so, that if things were to end with him tomorrow, I'd STILL wouldn't be interested in seeing Scottish Guy again).

And yes, it might not last. And yes, maybe it is just an infatuation. But it doesn't change the fact that PB had the balls to approach me, has the chivalry I was looking for (he parks his car in my lot and walks me to my building's door, instead of just pulling up to the door!), doesn't play games and somehow says out loud everything I'm thinking.

A couple of years ago, I did say that it only takes one day for your life to change. One day you're single, the next, you met the guy who will sweep you off your feet.

I'm a few hours from my next date with him, and I couldn't be more excited.

And yes, it is premature and it's going too fast, but I am falling in love with this boy.

As scary as it is, none of the guys I mentioned above have scared me. I haven't been this scared in almost four years. So I think the fear, that I might get my heart broken, or worse, that this might actually be it, is a good sign. It never felt so good to be so scared.